Gainfully unemployed?

I understand that this is not really the best economic climate to be picky about what kind of work you do. There is however a disconnect between my understanding that concept and being able to accept it...

According to Monster, CareerBuilder, Craigslist, Illinois Skills Match, the SIUC Job Bank, Instant Jobs Now, Indeed, Simply Hired, and Yahoo! Hot Jobs I am qualified for very little. Veeeeeeeeeeryyy little, like delivering pizzas little. What I am qualified for usually involves the words "clerical" and "filing" both of which cause me to internally cringe and make a terrible face at my monitor.

The job that I stumbled ass backwards into that I work at now started as something to do right out of school until I moved to Ireland and has become a way for me to learn lots about everything. Getting to be involved in weddings, web design, marketing and of course the great food definitely has its perks but yet and still I am just a glorified secretary. Seriously the next person who refers to me as a secretary to my face might just get beaten up. I feel like devising a strategic keyword ad campaign for major search engines is something that secretaries don't really do. Just saying.

One of the biggest lessons I learned from my trans-Atlantic adventure is that if you are surrounded with supportive people and love your job you will be a happy productive person with shiny hair and the ability to bake. Well sorta. But if you hate your 'flatmates' and your job and are crazy homesick then you will be miserable.

So I have one part of the equation down, I love my roommate very much and he can bake. The only variable left in this equation is the perfect 'career' and I don't think it would be fair to boyfriend to start our new life together constantly embittered because my boss keeps calling me "missy" and makes me alphabetically order his tire invoices. I mean worst case scenario right?

That is the other problem is all I keep thinking about is worst case scenarios. What if there are no jobs for me and no one hires me. Boyfriend is a grad student and while someday might be a Dr. (PhD. but it still counts) right now is still a broke ass student and cannot afford to pay a mortgage and support my wig habit simultaneously. So what if I wind up being a pizza delivery girl, or start working in an office with fake wood laminate desks and fluorescent overhead lighting heaven forbid. I keep asking myself if that would be so bad and the uppity wench in my head who needs to lay off on the eyeliner keeps screaming yes.

Also, please make no mistake I am not trying to act like I am too "good" to do these jobs. I think I have paid my dues, loads of waitressing, interning, filing, faxing, typing, interacting with other peoples children for profit, talking to very dumb people on the phone for long periods of time... been there and done that. I am ready for what will become a career, not just a "job".

Lets see here are the things I am good at and like to do, what kind of career would you recommend?

I like to write, take lots of pictures, play dress-up, meet people- all kinds of people, everywhere,
scrap, design, attend cocktail parties in elegant dresses, thrift, spend time talking to and learning from those who are smarter than I am, travel, shop for unique things that no one else has,
sample local micro-brews, make mixes of illegally downloaded music, drive around inner city areas looking for the best wig stores, sing karaoke, go to the beach, wander around libraries aimlessly,help people (not in a ohmygod I am a saint way, just in simple everyday ways) plan parties, oh and I like to write :)

So based on those things I am cut out to be either a drag queen librarian or a 1950's socialite.
I wonder what I would get if I typed that into my Monster job search criteria...

I think I would be great in non-profit fundraising, or as a wedding coordinator for a small vineyard or museum ( not a far cry from what I do now, just more midwesterny), or owning my own vintage clothing boutique next to a restored movie palace (ahem), alas such positions are difficult to find in a rural coal mining town, or probably anywhere for that matter.

All I want is to wake up excited about going to work, to not hate my job (not that I do now, I just don't want to in the future) to be able to afford a car with air conditioning and maybe get something with health benefits because I am pretty sure I should be going to the dentist more often.

You spend more time at work than anywhere else and I know what its like to walk to work at 5am in 2 degree weather (Celsius but still Ireland is freaking windy!) and mutter that same mantra in your head over and over..... theresnoplacelikehometheresnoplacelikehome
I have lots of sparkly shoes, some even in Ruby and that game just does not work.

Maybe I should just man up, and bite the bullet its only for a few years after all. I just would not want to wake up five years from now thinking that I wasted my youth fetching someone a nice hot Sanka and answering the phones.

If I could somehow manage to fit all the other stuff I love in somehow well I guess that would just be the ranch dressing on the chicken tenders of life. Or in clerical terms the flavored creamer in the instant coffee of life.

*Authors note... if you know of any one who is hiring in Southern Illinois, holler at your girl :)