Boo hiss

I am so sorry that I have been so M.I.A. guys I really have no actual excuse for why I have not updated you lately. Perhaps it is because it has been so surreal here these days.

I may or may not have mentioned in passing that the house is under siege. An army of country fried contractors arrives promptly at 8 am every morning and proceeds to beat, bang, saw, nail, sand, paint and essentially destroy any sanity or joy that I once possessed. 2011 Elm St. used to be my only sanctuary in this new and strange land. I was unpacked everything was clean and put in its place and life was beginning to be settled.

Until the contractors arrived.

Now all of my stuff is in a corner in the basement. Stacked on top of itself and strewn about. I have completely given up cleaning because the minute I pull out my Swiffer I know that four twenty something pot heads will be in with their muddy boots all over it yet again. I got that memo real quick. So Gus leaves and goes to work/school for ten hours a day and I get to stay at home. With the contractors. As we speak they have torn apart my closet and are slowly but surely wearing away what little sanity I have remaining.

The reasons why our house is under attack is because Gus and his Quaker ass self managed to haggle and finagle himself into 30,000 dollars in home repairs through our city and some kind of crazy home renovation loophole. Someday these repairs and upgrades will add value to the home and increase the profit margin so when we can finally move to the beach we have more money to do so. All of this nonsense is really a good thing. In the long run.

But right now it really. really. really sucks.

It will be nice to be able to walk around in my nightgown again, and to eat lunch and watch my Criminal Minds without a motley assortment of scraggly boys judging me for being a desperate housewife. A leisurely Diet Coke and popcorn snack just dos not taste the same when there is condescension afoot.

Also since they have until Christmas to finish..... ( you heard that right CHRISTMAS) Herman has made the executive decision that we need to help them along to get them out faster so I spent my Friday night painting the basement floor with a lovely waterlock, gray textured paint. To think I used to fritter away my weekends singing karaoke. Silly Erin this whole time I could have been using all that free time perfecting my woodworking skills or learning the fine art of jack hammering a big hole in the floor (*hangs head in shame).

I am a whiner, and ungrateful. I don't mean to be a bitch about it but I hate them and I shouldn't. I should welcome their simple hearts, pick up trucks and vast array of power tools into my life with open arms. There are people who have to either do their own home maintenance or at the very least have to pay someone else to do it. With the exception of the painting and the cleaning up after them I don't have to do either. Plus they are allegedly making things better and Gus gets school girl level excited when he comes home and sees that they have blown more insulation into the attic, or installed a sub pump. So it goes.

Anyways now you know why I cannot very well sit around and update my blog while there are people all around me using their hands to alter the landscape of my life. I will try to be better and keep you in the loop. Life here is bananas and I really should tell you more about it.

My apologies. Its not my fault people are not meant to function amidst so much noise and drywall dust. It is simply unnatural.